I have a black cat with golden eyes. Gonna have to revisit her name. Maybe 'Peanut'?

Long ago and far, far away my ex-husband (ex, see?) had a cat named Noether after Emmy Noether, a German Mathematician - you had to know my ex. This cat was evil personified. I like cats. I hated this one. She'd lay in wait and attack me, clawing her way up my legs, leaving drips of blood under my dress until she reached my butt where she regularly bit holes. Real holes in my flesh. She was all sweetness and light with him, rolling over for tummy rubs, purring in his ear, licking his unruly hair into cat perfection. When he was gone she'd eye me from across the room, tail snapping from side to side and begin the stalk. I lived in terror of stealth assaults. One lovely summer day I locked her outside the screen door hoping to get a little peace. She climbed and clung there yowling and hissing at me until he came home. We had words then and I gave him an ultimatum. Me or the cat.

Of course, it wasn't just the cat but you will notice he's definitely my ex. I think that cat and he deserved each other.